How to cultivate resilience: a toolkit for writers
How to cultivate resilience: a toolkit for writers
Writer and coach, Katherine Clements, on how to navigate a creative life
RLF Fellow Katherine Clements, author of , on how her own experience of dealing with rejections, bad reviews and writing blocks has helped her develop resilience. Here she shares her insights to help you too, including a practical exercise to overcome self-doubt.
My story isn’t special. Like most professional writers, I’ve dealt with rejections, poor sales, bad reviews and writing blocks. When my first novel flopped, I experienced a profound mental health crisis, which I kept secret until recently. I wrote about that here.
In the years since I’ve learned how to better manage the inevitable rollercoaster of a creative life. It was either this or do something else – become a plumber, perhaps, or open a cat sanctuary. But the muse insisted, and so, I am a writer. I’m also a trained coach, working with others who want to write.
Through this work, I’ve witnessed the common problems that most writers face and identified some effective ways to build resilience so that when tough times come, we handle them with perspective and courage.
What is resilience?
According to the OED, resilience is: ‘The quality or fact of being able to recover quickly or easily from, or resist being affected by, misfortune.’
Apparently, the first evidenced use of the word crops up in the writing of Francis Bacon (1561 – 1626). A polymath and prolific writer, Bacon reached the highest echelons of Jacobean society. His eventual downfall resulted in poverty, scandalous rumours and a conviction for corruption, including a brief spell in the Tower. Through it all, he kept writing. The man must have known a thing or two about resilience.
Resilience is borne of experience. Each time we experience ‘misfortune’ and recover, we prove to ourselves that we can cope. Rejections get a little easier, bad reviews don’t feel so personal, and failed projects are chalked up to experience – we develop the proverbial ‘thick skin’. But that’s not so helpful for early career writers or when we’re in the eye of the storm. So, how can we prepare ourselves?
Find your why
In research on building resilience, one word comes up a lot: purpose. Psychologist Angela Duckworth claims that ‘grit’ – a combination of passion and perseverance for a singularly important goal – is the hallmark of high achievers in every domain, while the American Psychological Association’s four tenets of building resilience place purpose at number one1. Identifying and pursuing our purpose clarifies intention and encourages motivation, even better if that purpose involves other people. There’s nothing like helping others to put our own troubles in perspective.
One of the first things I talk to clients about is ‘finding your why’. Why do you write? What does it bring to your life? Why does it matter? Honest answers to such questions are often surprising, as core values, intentions and rewards emerge that have little to do with the art of writing itself, such as seeking connection, self-expression or educating others.
These personal motivations act as a beacon, a guiding light that draws us on when darkness closes in. But we do need to keep the path illuminated. Sometimes, ‘finding your why’ leads to writing a personal mission statement, which can be revisited whenever we need to remind ourselves what we’re working towards and why.
How can we cultivate resilience?
We need that reminder because most of us are our own worst enemies. When things go wrong, they feed our inner critic—that negative voice that tells us we’re not good enough, that we’re fraudulent and destined for failure. Acknowledging and accepting that bad things will happen is crucial to building resilience, but dwelling on our failures is not.
Recognising unhelpful thought patterns and finding effective ways to change them is a lifetime's work, but starting is easier than you might think. I recommend a simple reflective practice – daily if possible – to identify the words we use and the stories we tell ourselves in these self-sabotaging moments.
Once we find these patterns and beliefs, we can work to reframe them. Sometimes, a fresh perspective is all it takes. Sometimes, simply voicing these things reduces their power. For some, this inner work might require talking therapy or other structured support. For others, it might be as simple as chatting things through with a friend or fellow writer.
Ask for help
I can’t overstate the importance of the latter. Other writers are our life raft. They are the ones who will commiserate with our woes and encourage us to write anyway. They are the champions who will cheer us on. There is immense value in writers talking to writers, in the shared experience of those on the same path.
Actively building and maintaining your writing community is another crucial factor in building resilience; these days, it’s easier than ever. Can’t find a community that suits you? Why not create one? If you have specific interests or needs, no doubt there will be other writers out there who do, too. Community with other writers establishes a network of supportive relationships we can lean on when we need it.
A mentor can help here, too. Find someone whose judgement you trust and who is a few steps ahead of you on the path. But I want you to be a mentor, too. It might seem daunting, but you’ll find that, no matter your experience level, you will have knowledge to share.
I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve sorely needed to hear the ‘advice’ I give to others. This helps validate and build confidence and a sense of purpose, which—as we know—feeds into resilience.
But, as any good mentor knows, you can’t give away what you haven’t got. The ultimate way to build resilience is to do more of the thing you’re scared of. This means taking action – usually contrary to what your fear tells you to do. Scared of public speaking? Volunteer to talk to a local writing group. Terrified of rejection? Submit more work for consideration. Get more ‘nos’.
Beth Pickens, an artist coach, recommends setting a rejection goal—say, twenty rejections in twelve months. Over time, this will take the sting out of individual rejections and increase your chances of success.
Feel the fear
Recently, my challenge has been to become more visible and honest in my writing and the way I promote it. To shift this fear, I set myself small visibility goals that are a little outside my comfort zone. Each time I complete one, it gets easier—it’s a work in progress. And that’s the point. We can’t expect ourselves to transform overnight. Resilience is a muscle that will only strengthen if we work on it.
And as for Francis Bacon?
Following his release from the Tower, Bacon wrote to the Spanish ambassador that he would ‘betake myself to letters'. In his last years, he composed numerous historical works, published on law and natural philosophy, and released new editions of his bestselling work. Legend has it that he died partway through writing a letter to the Earl of Arundel, still hopeful of a return to the political stage – a resilient writer to the end.
Katherine’s daily practice to help overcome self-doubt:
I recommend a reflective journaling process. There is something about putting pen to paper that helps clarify thoughts.
After each writing session, take a moment to notice what you believe about your writing.
Use these questions as a prompt:
What do I believe about my writing today?
What words am I using in relation to my writing?
Are they positive or negative? How are those words serving me?
What are my beliefs showing me?
What words can I use instead?
Try rewriting your earlier statement using the opposite sentiment, even if it doesn’t ring true in the moment.
Sometimes, simply identifying unhelpful thinking is enough to shift it.
Katherine Clements is an author, editor and coach for writers. She writes dark historical fiction; her most recent book is The Coffin Path. She is an RLF Fellow, a Fulbright Scholar and an accredited coach. She writes The Inkwell on Substack, where she hosts a growing community of ambitious writers interested in creating productive and rewarding writing lives. She is currently hosting #100 Days of Writing, a gentle writing challenge to help writers reconnect with regular, playful creative practice. Her next book, a novella commissioned as part of the Northern Weird Project, will be released in 2025.
The others are healthy thinking (acknowledging challenges, reflecting on and learning from past experiences, and planning for the future), connection (working with others and being part of a community), and wellness (physical and mental). Summarised from Written by Bec Evans and Chris Smith.
Katherine is absolutely right about asking the fundamental questions. In my new book, "So, you think you're a Writer" (out at the end of October), the very first question I ask - of four key questions - is 'why do you write?' It's hard to make meaningful progress without understanding that, without understanding yourself.
Wonderful reminders. For me, the WHY is easy. The harder part is looking at the TikTokification of publishing and wondering HOW. But that’s another topic, I guess.